Ambitious parents are instrumental in childhood’s modern malaise
The run-up to Christmas was also the season for piano exams. I was waiting with my youngest in some soulless hall, when a boy of about 8 arrived with his father and two teachers, all of them whispering last-minute instructions at him. The organiser had to prevent the father accompanying his son into the exam room: children must perform on their own, he explained. This seemed to be a new idea.
When my own child trooped off to his fate at the keyboard, I asked the father which grade his son was taking. “Grade 1” he replied: beginner level. Whoa, I thought: this was a truly vertiginous level of helicopter parenting. But from “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star”, perhaps, he envisaged a career at Goldman Sachs would follow.
Raising three children in central London, I’ve seen my fair share of over-parenting: Dads screaming abuse on touchlines and Mums doing their kids’ homework. But this latest example upset me. Music is one of the greatest gifts you can give a child. For me, playing the piano has been a life-long form of therapy. But a music teacher tells me he sees many wealthy families push their kids as hard as possible to play instruments until they are about 14, at which point they abruptly switch focus to GCSEs. The ones with talent are devastated — the others have already been put off music for life.
This story originally appeared on: Financial Times - Author:Camilla Cavendish
